How I Kept it Together

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For the last several weeks you have probably seen a lot of advertisements for Shabbat Project, a global event celebrating Shabbat across the world. There was countless advertisements on facebook, through the different Synagogue communities, signs all over this city.

What does it all mean? Well, in very simple terms, Shabbat is a 25 hour period where we disconnect to be connected. Sounds complicated, you would think? Well, I am here to tell you that yesterday I did just that. I disconnected and became REALLY connected, in a way that I wasn’t quite expecting.

I chose to attend Thornhill Woods Shule. It is not within walking distance from my home (well it “could” be, but that is a whole other story). I drove there. It is not all or nothing as Lori Palatnik always says, so there was no issue for me with that.

I was greeted as I always am, with open arms, hugs from the wonderful people in this community. I have known them for over two and half years since I went to Israel with JWRP at they were my hosts for the trip. The women and families of this community are incredible wonderful people. I went on my own, but you can’t be ALONE in a community like this.

I sat down in one of my first two classes of the day. The class was a supplement to the parchat which was being read this week – Parchat Noach. Noah, was a Mensch. What is a Mensch, and how can we relate that to our everyday lives. The discussion affected me in a way I wasn’t prepared for. Due to some recent events in my life, I have been faced with many questions and it brought me to tears. The women were so compassionate in this class and it continued all day long.

After the class was a wonderful Shabbat lunch. I was again welcome to sit with my friends and their families. We ate, sang, and listened to words about community and how even though this is a special Shabbat, that every Shabbat is warm and welcoming and we should all come all the time.

After lunch was over, my friends asked me to come back to their house and stay in the community. I was more than happy to do that. We walked to their house, and sat and had tea and more discussion.

Another friend knocked on the door at 415 to walk to another house in the community for another class. This class was also on a similar theme and again, brought me to tears.  I was told a couple of years ago by a Rebbitzen that I respect greatly that growth is (and can be at times) painful. But at the end of the pain comes greatness. I felt like I was working through my pain allowing my greatness to come through.

Our last stop of the day was for the Suedah Slisheit, which means the third meal. This was for women and children while the men were at Shule and having their own Suedah. This was social and fun and lots of great conversation and lots of time to ask questions from the women who knew much more than I did. At one point I apologized for asking so many questions and someone said, “not to worry, it is a good thing. Sometimes you may ask questions that others who should know but don’t want to ask, and you beat them to it.”

After walking back to my friends house, Shabbat was over. The Havdalah candle was lit, prayers were said, spices smelled, wine sipped and a new week begins.

What did I learn by “Keeping it Together”? More than I can even begin to write about. When I went on the JWRP trip to Israel I went open to all the possibilities and received more than I could have ever imagined.

I had many offers to spend a weekend in the community and spend sundown to sundown connecting. I know that the people who made the offers will ask me again and I promised I would be back.

I was told that this ‘amazing’ day happens, ‘every week’ and that I should come back for more. It was said jokingly, but I think that it needs to be noted. Just because this global Shabbat Project was one 25 hour period, there are people all around us that spend this 25 hour period disconnected every week. There is something to said about it.

I had a wonderful, spiritual, meaningful day “Keeping it Together”.

However you spent your day yesterday, I hope it was wonderful as well.

Shavua Tov everyone! Have a good week.

L

 

 

Only a matter of time

On By thestampsinmypassportIn Uncategorized1 Comment

There is terror in Canada. We all know it and now it has hit us twice in the same week.

Back in September my parents and I were at the Blue Jay game at the Skydome (I know, I know Rogers Centre). As we approached gate 13 area where we usually go in, we stopped to get our hot dogs at our usual vendor.

While waiting in line we noticed that there were more Jays staff/security around the gates. We didn’t know what it was about, but as we walked closer to the gates we saw that there were xray machines, and that was what was taking the extra time and the extra staff. The signs said that they were getting ready for the 2015 season.

My mom and I approached a police officer and he commented that Toronto was the last major league stadium to install the machines.

Then he said something interesting to us. He said that Canadians are very unaware of what is going on in our country. That there are more terrorist cells in Canada than there are in the United States. He went on to say, that it would only be a matter of time.

And so here we are. Social media, and all the news outlets are all focused on Ottawa today and Montreal as well. I just read one article headline that said, how safe are we that a lone gunmen can get right up to these men and shoot at close range.

We are changed. Terror keeps getting closer and closer to us.

I don’t even really know what else to say. My thoughts and prayers are with the family of Nathan Cirillo.

What is really going on?

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For those of you who may not know, I am on the board at my condo. It is a volunteer position which has very little “gratitude” involved. We attend meetings, make multi-million dollar decisions for the community in which we live in. Being on a voluntary board of any kind is not a small task. You are often questioned about decisions, people knock on your door with questions, people who really shouldn’t have your phone number but do (for other reasons) call to ask you questions. But, I am on the board for many reasons. One of which is to be a part of the process of what goes on in community living.

Our building is not very old, just over eight years to be correct. The builder (as in a lot of cases) did a very “minimal” job with the carpets in our building. We have many pets in our community and within this short period of time, the carpets have been destroyed. If you have come to visit me, you may have noticed while walking down the hall.

So, as the board we had to interview design firms and choose one to work with. We did that.

We also went and toured several other sites with the pending teams to see their work in person and not just in a power point presentation. We did that.

We went through several months of carpet samples, wall paper samples, colour schemes to come up with two options to present to the community.

Last night was the presentation meeting to show them the concept boards and samples. If you live in a condo, or ever attend any types of community meetings you know how they go. It is like the 80/20 rule. Twenty percent of the people cause 80% of the trouble. No different here. But for me, last night, was more personal. In light of the recent bullying I was talking about a few weeks ago, my senses are heightened and I am much more aware of how people speak to others. I can’t understand it.

Our board president spoke eloquently and passionate about the building. That we need this renovation and the process that we took as the board to get us to that night. She introduced the designer to the group of residents in the room. She started her presentation. She really couldn’t even get through the presentation to showcase the true beauty of what we all had chosen for the building. She was berated, yelled at, questioned and I do not like to overuse this word, but abused by total strangers.

Towards the end of the meeting, I actually had to step in and stop the meeting. I told her to step aside. I said to the residents, that the meeting will not continue if you continue to be abusive and rude to our guest. That was the end of the formal meeting. But it didn’t end there. One of the men came up to me and started in on me. He actually said, “I don’t believe you did…” I called over the designer and said, this man just called me a liar, would you care to tell him what actually happened. He said, I never called you a liar. I replied, “you said you didn’t believe me” it is the same thing.

I live in this community. Communities are made up of different groups of people, from different countries, different socio-economic backgrounds, and everything in between, but there seems to be a lack of the basics I am finding, on a more general level in today’s world. People have less patience, more “balls” to say whatever is on their mind without any thought of recourse. People are rude and abusive daily, from my recent experiences. I can go on and on about this but I am not going to.

I think I will leave it with one final thought. We don’t always hear the answers we want to hear, or accept the options provided, or feel that maybe we weren’t heard. Life is not black or white, it is probably at least fifty shades of grey. If everyone took a breath BEFORE they spoke, or replied, or commented on something, and thought about that, maybe there would be less verbal abuse in our communities today.

Something to think about as you all start your day today. Lisa