Things I have learned after being pushed off a cliff

On By thestampsinmypassportIn Uncategorized2 Comments

Of course I didn’t really get pushed off a cliff, but in a figurative way, I did. Last fall I finally changed jobs, actually careers. That is where the cliff comes in play. It was a HUGE departure for me to leave the world I have known for over 24 years without a parachute.

I know many people who have changed jobs, careers, etc many times in their professional life. The online statistics about new graduates is that they will change careers 5 -7 times. That for someone who is 42, you may have already had 10 jobs? Say what?? I am 43 and I have basically had one job for 25 years (with a few different companies).

That was not me. I am a creature of comfort. I stayed in my past life for many reasons. There were many times, when I should have made changes, but never did. What I have come to realize is that when you are in your own vortex of life, you can’t always see the signs as you are swirling through the motions. Sometimes you actually do, but choose to ignore them. Now that I have been away from that life for almost three months I have learned a lot about myself and the world I was once a part of.

Quality of my life

I worked a lot. I worked weekends, nights, days off, statutory holidays, brought work home with me. All of it. Now granted, I was working on commission and that is the driven lifestyle that you develop over years and years of working on commission. There were times when I felt like my quality of life wasn’t what is should or could be.

In my new world, which by the way is still travel related, it couldn’t be farther from the life I was living. I work like a ‘normal’ person. Sometimes is still hard to get used to the fact that I can make plans on the weekends, I get weekends off. I get holidays off. Very funny story, in early December I was looking at the way Christmas fell and that I would have four days off in a row. Four full days off. I haven’t had four days off in a row over holiday time in more than 15 years.

Don’t get me wrong, I still work through my lunch. That seems to be a constant in my life. In the two branch offices that I worked in, there wasn’t a lunch room. Every day I ate at my desk. When I worked at the call centre there was a lunch room, so it was a great way to have a break and step away (which you needed to for your sanity). Working from home, well…we don’t need to go there….If you have ever worked from home, you will know what I mean.

Loss of friendship

Through this change I have not only left that work culture behind, but some friends along with it. As hard is that has been, it is probably a necessary part of change. Something I decided I needed to do was to remove some people from my friend list on Facebook. I was going through my own changes in my own time, and needed to separate past work life with new work life. A couple of friends couldn’t understand the need for personal space and took it very personally.

I really didn’t understand why they were mad, hurt, whatever with me for my need for some personal space as I made my life decisions. Another friend pointed out something that I think is true. These people are still on top of the cliff and haven’t jumped off or been pushed off (for whatever the reasons). It is more about “them” and not really about me.

Some of my past work relationships have gotten stronger since I moved on. Once we set boundaries about not really talking about work, we can get to know each other on different levels that have nothing to do with work. Those relationships will carry on. The others ones won’t, and maybe in the long run, weren’t really going to anyway. It has been hard to accept, but as I said earlier, the farther away I am from it, the more I seem to understand it.

Feeling appreciated

The best part of my new job is that I get to use everything I have learned for the past 25 years of work life and put it into action. I know that may seem melodramatic, but it really isn’t. I am part of a lot of different areas of my new job and my new role changes day to day. It is a new and growing company and I am part of the growth, and I love it. I am asked my opinion and my thoughts are actually heard. It is so refreshing to be part of something like this. I really like the role that I have stepped into.

The moral of my story I suppose is once I got up and dusted myself off from falling off the cliff, is the realization that you do, in fact, stand up.  You stand up and start climbing the next one. Life is one day at a time, and every day the message is to learn something new. I am very excited to be in this new role and learning so much after such a short period of time. It is refreshing, and inspiring to me. Inspiring me to learn more and be more.

Thank you for reading, it means a lot to me.

Live your best life,

Lisa

Pere Lachaise

On By thestampsinmypassportIn Uncategorized2 Comments

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I had this post in my drafts folder for a while. It was empty. I was going to write about Pere Lachaise in one of my travel posts, but I think I will use it for a different purpose.
Pere Lachaise is self-described as the world’s most-visited cemetery attracts more than 1.5 annual visitors. Many are here to pay their respects to celebrities as varied as writers Oscar Wilde and Marcel Proust, musician Jim Morrison of The Doors, composer Chopin, actor Sarah Bernhardt, and singer Edith Piaf. (Pick up a cemetery map at the conservation office.) If you’re not the starstruck type, you can still appreciate the views of Paris, the Haussmannian chambers, and haunting statues and mausoleums.

I had the chance to visit Pere Lachaise when I went to Paris in 2006. Clients always had a puzzled look on their faces when we would discuss what to see and do while in Paris and I always recommended going to this cemetery. We don’t have anything like it in Canada. There are tombs and family plots that date back to the 1400’s. It is a very large place and easy to get lost for hours walking around (which we did).

While looking at the map and walking around I noticed that there was a Holocaust Memorial section of the cemetery. When I walked over to that section, I was quite surprised by it. The monuments and words of course were in French, which you could translate loosely, but the sculptures left a long lasting affect on me, and not in a good way. I didn’t take a photo because it was disturbing – it was a memorial for Auschwitz and it was a skeleton pushing a wheelbarrow with a skeleton in it.

My first thought was why? I really didn’t know that much about the France and the treatment of the Jews until a couple of years later. What I have learned since has been eye opening. In light of the recent events, even more so.

I began to read the book Sarah’s Key. It is a novel, but it is based on true event that happened in Paris in 1942. It was called the Vel D’hiv Round Up. Over the course of a week over 13,000 Jews (about 4000 children) were round up and put in the Veledrome D’Hiver. The atrocities that happened there, I don’t need to discuss, for obvious reasons. By the end of September 1942 almost 38,000 Jews had been deported to Auschwitz from France. In 1945 only some 780 of them remained alive.

I could not put the book down. I started it on a Wednesday night, and started again on Thursday after work. Finished reading it about 1am and went to bed. Woke up at 7am and started to read on line about the Vel D’hiv and the horrible treatment of Jews in France during the second world war.

And over the past few years (and weeks) the treatment of Jews is France is frightening and alarming. Where are we? Are we back in 1942 or are we over 70 years past that time? Lines are blurred and getting crossed every day.

Which leads me to the conversation I had with my mother last Friday night dinner. I know a lot of people that have parents or grandparents or other family members that are survivors of the Holocaust. Thankfully our family (both my mom and my dad’s) were here in Canada and didn’t really have the memories (or tragedies) in their life. Both of them are baby boomers (born in 1945) so they were young after the war and these were things that weren’t taught in school at that time.

My friend Adrienne and her mother are embarking on a journey this weekend. Her mother, Miriam Ziegler is a survivor of Auschwitz. She is going back for the 70th anniversary of the liberation of the camp. Can you believe that it is 70 years since it was all over in Auschwitz, yet, if you look at what is happening in France and other parts of Europe, you would think we were back there again. Being round up, and killed.

Yet, Miriam is alive. She went on to have children and grandchildren. She is the legacy of our people. Really, for everyone of the six million Jews that died in the Holocaust, there are generations that died along with them.

It is Shabbat. So hopefully as you sit down with your family tonight, you will light your candles, and pray not just for your family, but for all Jewish people, who are here with us or here in spirit.

Shabbat Shalom. Amen.

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Life’s Whispers

On By thestampsinmypassportIn Uncategorized1 Comment

So here we are, the last day of 2014. I have to admit, I had planned to write more in December and wrap up the year, but my computer died mid month and that set me back a couple of weeks. I really do need a laptop and perhaps that is one of the goals I will set for myself in 2015. A laptop = freedom. No longer chained to a desk.

And so now we are here. It has been an interesting year, not like that is something new and I discovered the answer to life, but every year is different. I was talking to a friend a couple of years ago, and I was bitching (around the end of that year) about how this happened, and how that was bad, blah blah blah. The reply I got was, well, what about that trip you took, or play you saw, or that concert you went to? Yes, the glass is half full. I get it.

But it isn’t always half full. There are times, when we (I, me, you) can feel like the glass is half empty. Life doesn’t always happen the way you would like it to.

Oprah speaks openly about listening to your life’s whispers. If you don’t listen to the whispers, they get louder, and louder until they hit you in the head. I also learned that in my personal growth class earlier this year. And then I lived it. If you have had one of these experiences, you know that getting hit with the lesson – HURTS!

It is a huge lesson to learn. I think that the interesting thing that I have come to learn from it is that once you are far enough away from it, you can see it with more clarity. It is almost “too little too late” but when people tell you that you will be better for it in the end, it is true. You can’t possibly see that while you are in it, but it does happen.

And then you start to look forward. Forward is the way we should all be moving in life. It is good to look back and reflect, but living in the reflection isn’t good. It is painful, and for some reason, people (again I, me, you) cause ourselves pain. Self inflicted, why do we do that?

There are more things I want to say, but I think I will leave it here for now. Wishing all of you a happy new year.

Thank you for reading my blog and being a part of my life. In 2015 I hope to continue to write on a more regular basis. I hope that you will continue to read, and hopefully share my stories with your friends and the people in your life. We are living in a “sharing” society these days, so please feel free.

Live well. Laugh often. Love much. Leave memories.